Fly on the Wall

Hi, I'm Riley and I'm Jainee's imaginary friend.

First of all let me get something straight. I may not be a human being......yet.....but I am very much real. Jainee may be the only one that can see me, but I am as real as you are. Recently I've been wandering around this house, taking in the view and watching this family live their lives. It's like being the ultimate fly on the wall. They don't know I'm there (well except for Jainee) and I get to watch everything they do.You know, those things that you do when you think no one's looking? I know this family better than they know themselves. Oh and I'm not the only imaginary friend around here. This is Ronnie. He's Jainee's brother's imaginary friend.

Jonas may be able to see Ronnie but he can't see me. Just like Jainee can't see Ronnie. I got to tell you, I almost wish Jonas could see me. That is one WEIRD kid. Jainee doesn't believe half the stuff I tell her about him. She thinks I'm making it up. You probably wouldn't believe it either. But oh, it ain't half as bad as what their Mother is like. Exhibit A:

Who goes parading around in their swimsuit just to take their newborn daughter on a stroll? Her husband is such a good guy, I don't know what he sees in her. Don't get me wrong, I think she's a good wife and mother. It's not like child services has knocked on the door to take the kids back. Well, not yet at least. Someone did come by to take the dog away. Poor Chlo-chlo. Of course I don't blame the family for what happened. They've been focused on raising five kids. A dog is just a little too much handle.

The social worker went to scold Andrea for not taking good care of the dog. Of course, he probably handles dogs all time, but screaming babies? Not his cup of tea I bet. Anywho, back to Andrea. Everyday Josh comes home from work, she asks him how much money he brought home. She also sketches it down on a notepad when no one's looking. She seems to be a little money obsessed. She tried to talk Josh out of moving to a bigger house. "But it costs WAY too much money" she said.  I still don't think she's happy about the move.

Another thing is, who puts the wrong date on a birthday party invitation? That invitation went out to several people and they didn't show up for the party until a few days later. Poor Aubrey. Aubrey told her mother that in no way did she want Mercedes Poindexter to come to the party. Aubrey and Mercedes don't really get along that well. Well Mercedes did her a birthday present. The next morning Aubrey found it.

Because of Mercedes' prank, Aubrey was late for school that day. Aubrey hasn't been doing so well in school. Joshua found out she flunked her Chemistry test and he was all too unhappy it.

Aubrey is not that bad a girl. Luckily she wasn't grounded, especially since her prom is coming up. Sadly she has no one to go with. I don't know whether it was because she got in trouble or because she was depressed about not having a date but Aubrey was actually doing the dishes for once.

I feel bad for Aubrey. Jainee and Jonas have each other and they also have Ronnie and I. Aubrey's best friend is her cousin David but she doesn't live near him anymore.

I wish Jainee didn't have to go to school. I get bored all day with nothing to do and when Jainee does come home she spends most of her time working on homeworking. She did promise me we would spend some more time together this weekend.

One of Jainee's favorite things to do is to go fishing. I suggested we take a fishing trip this weekend and she loved the idea. She's such a tomboy.

The parents have their hands full with the babies, so Jainee and Jonas were forced to eat leftover Goopy Carbonara. Jainee wondered if she could use it somehow as fish bait.  Maybe if you smother it on some worms?

Jonas and Ronnie have fun together all the time. All Jainee likes to do is fish and talk. I mean, I like to do those things too......I guess....but we never seem to branch out. For once, I would like to do something spontaneous and new. But I'm here to be Jainee's friend so I guess I don't mind.

 Even Josh and Bimble have too much fun together. Boys will be boys.

The little twins are so cute. I wonder how Penny and Perry are going to turn out when they grow up? In this family, who knows?

I remember when Jainee and Jonas were that small. I heard Josh and Andrea talking about the possibility of having another child. I'm not so sure this family would survive.

The Wrong Date

Sleepwalking during the day? I don't think that's a good thing...

Oh hey there, the name's Aubrey. I'm the oldest child of the Cole Family and it's my birthday today! We're supposed to have a party tonight but I'd rather go to sleep. Being a kid is exhausting sometimes, especially with all the chores, homework and everything else parents make you do. "BUT MOM, I'M SO TIRED!" It didn't matter matter how much I whined. I was going to have this party and it was going to be tonight.

Mom did all the party planning. She sent out the invitations, bought the cake, and even hired entertainment, or so she said. I dunno though. I'm not sure if I should trust Mom to do everything just right. She can be a little insane sometimes. Well, as it turned out, when it was time for the party, no one showed up.

I mean, I know I don't care and everything but not even grandma and grandpa showed up. What could they possibly be doing that's more important that watching their own granddaughter turn into a teenager? Or even Uncle Alex or Uncle Darren? Aunt Jaida and Uncle John? NO ONE?

Oh well, I'm just going to blow out my candles then and go to bed I really don't care.

Daddy says I look just like my mother. I just hope this doesn't mean I'm going to inherit her personality too.

 

I started heading to my room to FINALLY crash. Well, let's just say I didn't get very far.

 

The next day was the first day of high school. It went alright I guess. Met some new friends. I joined the cheerleading squad. I got buttloads of homework. Typical high school. There's a school dance coming up Friday. I wonder who I'm going to ask?

I've noticed the twins carry around these stupid dolls everywhere we go. Anytime they refer to their dolls, they act like they're real. I made the mistake of calling them dolls once, boy did they ever let me have it.

 

Momma is preggars..........VERY preggars.  Daddy has to fuss at her for doing things like playing with the dog, repairing the dishwasher, you know things you SHOULDN'T do when you're about to go into labor any day now. She just ignores him. Yesterday she went to the spa all by herself. I can't imagine what would have happened if she went into labor there.

Daddy's been stressed out over work. He's been coming home grumpy lately. Momma told him he should just take the occasional day off of work but he won't hear it. He says there's too much to do and he's behind on most of his work.

I saw my cousin David at school today and he wanted to know if I wanted to come over and hang out at their house. Aunt Jaida bought our old house when we moved. Stepping back into the house I grew up in was very nostalgic.

I was just about to chill on our old couch when David asked me if I was excited about the party tonight? "What party?" I asked. "You're kidding me right? Isn't it your birthday party tonight?" My eyes grew big. He handed me an invitation and my hand just met forehead. No wonder nobody showed to my party the other night. Momma put the wrong day on the invitation.
(I don't know if this was a glitch in the game or what but for some reason the party I planned for Aubrey happened the following day)

Sure enough, people started showing up to our house that evening. I caught a ride with David back home. Outside our door waiting to go in I saw Uncle Alex and Mercedes Poindexter. Oh no, not Mercedes! Did my Mom actually invite HER?? Grrrr....

Uncle Alex usually doesn't have time to come over and visit. So when Daddy saw him at the party, he got excited. He decided to take a lot of his work aggression out in a friendly pillow fight. I never knew my Dad to act like such a kid.

Look who else showed up! My Daddy doesn't talk a whole lot about Uncle Darren. I think he thinks he's weird. I find him fascinating though. Turns out his wife just had a baby girl, Faye. Daddy says he feels sorry for that baby.

The night was getting late and most everyone was heading home. I realized I still needed to work on my Algebra homework so I told David he had to help me before he left. You know, this my be weird of me to say this but I think David is very cute. But don't worry. I don't think of him that way. He's my cousin after all but he's like a brother to me.

Funny thing, the party was over people were JUST leaving to go home and wouldn't you know it, Momma goes into labor.

 

Grandad was freaking out. Hilarious. It's not like he hasn't had 4 children and 7 grandchildren already.

Well, while Momma and Daddy were at the hospital, I helped out by saying goodbye to the guests and heading on to bed. Little did I know it but when I would wake up that morning, I would be a big sister again......

Meet my new brother and sister, Penny and Perry.

Proud Daddy

I remember back to Senior Prom. I asked Andrea to go steady with me. We slowed dance on the dance floor. It was a night neither of us will forget. Fast forward years later and here we are with 3 kids and little sanity left. Would I go back to the good old days? No, I love my family. My kids, even when they are aggravating as snot mean the world to me.

"Honey, the tots are both asleep and at the same time. It's just you and me now. You know what we can do?"
"Heehee, I don't know Joshie, why don't you show me."

Okay, so we started fooling around a bit in front of the tots, but they were asleep right?

I walked Andrea over to the bedroom. I set the lights for the right mood and for a moment. It was just me and her and no one else in our new house.  She looked back at me with the same intensity.

It's one of those moments that you really are not in control. You give in to your instincts. Pleasure takes control and everything else just happens.

Later...

It's about to be the twins' birthday soon. Since I had the day off of work, Andrea and I spent the day helping the toddlers learn to walk. Even Bimble helped out some.

Andrea started feeling a little squeamish. I said it was because we needed to clean out the tot's potties.

Apparently the closest toilet was Aubrey's. "MOM!! You're cleaning that up!!"

Pretty soon the twins' birthday was upon us. I'm sure going to miss the how cute they at this age. I'm not going to miss the constant crying and cleaning up after them.

Aubrey said she was going to cook some cookies and muffins for the occasion and sell them to the party guests as they arrive.

Aubrey set up her stand in front our house and waited for the guests to arrive. I would have helped her out but Andrea had me running all over the house getting ready for the party. I was sure was proud of the way she set everything up herself.

The party guests were starting to arrive. My brother Alex was the first to arrive followed soon by Momma and my other brother Darren. This is the first time I've seen my brothers in a LONG time. Alex lives up by Crystal Springs. He runs a small ranch up there and never seems to find the time to visit. Darren....I'm not sure where he lives. To be honest, this is the first time I've seen him since my wedding. He got married to some girl...I think her name is Lexi...and there isn't any telling what he's been doing. He's always kinda creeped me out to be honest. I think Mom keeps in touch with him and brought him to the party.

I'm not sure why, but no one stopped to visit Aubrey and have some of her cookies. I felt really bad for her. Again, I would have loved to, but the party was requiring my attention.

Well soon it was time to blow out the candles for the tots. I noticed Andrea was dressed in her wedding dress. Don't ask.....please.

I think the kids aged up nicely. I wasn't sure what happened to Jainee's hair. Andrea said she just needed to fix it up a little.

I went inside to eat just to get away from the commotion outside and Jainee pulled up her seat next to me. I was proud daddy.

Well the kids are growing up so maybe without any little ones around the house things will be getting back to normal...

....well I may have spoken to soon.....it appears I going to be a proud daddy all over again.